Chewable Fiber....A Thing of the Past

1.29.14

So far I have not taken any chewable fiber for almost 3 weeks.   I decided to stop buying them once I ran out to see how I did.  I knew I was taking way more than was necessary simply because they were like having candy.  I mean who doesn’t like gummy bears right?  lol  So I stopped hoping that I would be able to have a bowel movement without much difficulty.  So far….so good.  I am not saying it is super easy going, but it isn’t too bad either.  The iron vitamins I take can make a person more constipated so my doctor told me to only take those every other day.   I have also been trying to eat things that have more fiber in them.   Particularly raisins.   Those are high in iron and help you go to the bathroom….so I have been adding them in my oatmeal and in with my cottage cheese.  I am also trying to eat other high fiber items just incase.  
What a process this is!  If any one thinks that having weight loss surgery is just an easy fix let me tell you they are very wrong.  It is a daily effort to maintain your health and monitor yourself physically and mentally.  I would say I still struggle with the mental food issues the most.  I have been trying super hard to not eat more than I need to in regards to fat grams and just pointless snacking but when it’s winter time and you are stuck in the house for so long it is hard to just not want to walk over to the fridge constantly and grab a snack just because you can.   When I do….I just make myself grab peaches, or a banana...but man is it rough to make myself do that too!  

James has been a great help though.   If I feel like I am struggling in the evening and really want to snack just because, not due to real hunger, I tell him to not let me eat, and simply telling him that really helps.  I know he is watching me when I get up and he makes sure I am just getting a drink.  Knowing he is keeping an eye on me is so helpful.  Especially since he will tell me to put snacks down.  lol  

I tried on my swimsuits from last summer yesterday to make sure they still look good.  Wanted to kinda check since I have had my breasts fixed twice since then.   They look better then before actually which made me really happy.  James especially liked them. lol   Of course.  lol  I am however missing one of my favorite swimsuit tops and have no idea where it could be….that is really bugging me and I am determined to find it.  Although I have no idea where to even start looking!  ugh.

Still maintaining my weight….150 pounds.   I am very proud of myself and am positive that I can continue to do well.  When I think back to how scared I was that I would not be able to handle this lifestyle it seems silly….routine sets in and you get the hang of it….why do I always doubt myself?  Need to get better about that as well I suppose.  lol  

In a little over a month my reconstructive surgery will be paid off in full!!!  This is exciting since February 21st also marks one year since it was done.  We thought for sure it would be a 3 year ordeal of paying it but James was blessed with his wonderful new job that he got about 7-8 months ago which provides an amazing bonus once a year.  When he gets that at the end of February a huge chunk will go to paying that off and we couldn’t be happier.   What a relief that will be for us all.  Even better is I will be able to put in my two weeks notice at Kroger and finally go back to being a stay at home Mom...which is what I love doing the most and miss.  It has been great working and meeting so many wonderful people...some of which I know will be lifelong friends….but it will be so wonderful to be done as well and have the stress and worries of working a job behind me.   

So that is what is going on right now….hope you all are well and thanks for reading!  

Darn Fat Brain!!!

1.23.14 Well….things are looking good.  I am still maintaining a steady weight of 150 pounds.   Which I know is what the doctors want and say is a good weight but man oh man is it hard to not want to be lower since I have seen a lower number before.  I would just like to see it say at least 145 again...but I am trying to be content and happy with 150.  It’s really a lot harder than you would think.  My fat girl brain is still there and is constantly trying to tell me that I need to get back down to that weight.  Fixing my brain is proving to be very difficult.  

My breasts are still healing well...I have been experiencing some sharp random pains that last 10-20 seconds just for the last couple days in my right breast right behind the nipple area, but I am assuming that is normal and all part of healing up.  If it continues on though I will mention it when I have my appt on the 8th of February.  I can lay on my side though again since this procedure and that is a welcomed thing since I really don’t like laying on my back.   I am however beginning to wonder if I will ever be able to sleep on my stomach again.  I miss it so so much and every time I even attempt it, it is very uncomfortable.  I know it will only be a year since this was all done next month and so I shouldn't rush it but damn I really do miss it...and it’s the way I sleep the best!

I had to call the hospital a couple days ago and left a message for Dr. Taylor's office (he is the doc I see now since Dr. Schram is no longer at that hospital) and said that I needed a doctors note stating that I have to have a bottle of water with me at all times while at work.  Adam, my boss, is trying to do everything by the book now and so since we are not technically supposed to have one with us I need a note.  I received a call back from his secretary Shari who said she would be emailing me the signed note and then I could print it myself.  I am hoping to get it soon.  I should have gotten it yesterday actually, that was when she said she would send it, I am hoping I get it today or tomorrow since I work Saturday.     

Anyway...that is the latest.   More to come soon as always.  :)