Freedom!

I have been looking up lots of videos and pictures recently that show the procedure for a tummy tuck and also pictures of before and after for it and for a breast lift.  The images and videos are of course very graphic and scary but I think overall I am excited!  Despite how painful I know it will be, I can’t wait to have the end result that so many of the women in the pictures have.  

Today I was watching a very lengthy video on YouTube (90 minutes long!) about a 600 pound woman and her journey to freedom through gastric bypass surgery.  It literally is a freedom we are experiencing.  She of course was in a worse place than I was, was incredibly limited in her mobility and quality of life, but the feeling of being “free”, free from what I can only describe as a “fat prison”, is hard to explain to someone who hasn’t been there themselves.  There are things that you risk changing in your life that maybe you didn’t want to have change...or at least, were not anticipating that come along with all the wonderful good things that change.

For this woman it was her marriage.  She had gone from having a husband who took care of her, him feeling needed and wanted and feeling like this was his job in life, to take care of this woman he loved...to suddenly she is getting thinner, healthy, able to go out and work, meet people, socialize again...and for him, it was scary.  He started to think she would leave him...and many other issues came forth out of that.  I guess it’s something that I hadn’t really considered until watching the video...it isn’t just you going through the weight loss journey and experiencing different feelings...your spouse is also in this...not experiencing the same emotions you are...but having new feelings about these changes in you.  

I feel so beyond blessed to have a husband who is supportive of me in every way, who cheers me on and wants what is best for my health...but most importantly I have a man who finds me sexy at any weight...he loves me, adores me...and is confident in us and our marriage.   He doesn’t feel worried that I will run off and try to find someone new, or that I will go out and start partying and acting inappropriate...he has a trust in me that can only come from God.  I am so thankful.  

There are lots of great changes that come with such a drastic amount of weight loss...but there can also be negatives...and I am glad that worrying about my husband is not one that I have to deal with.   :)