Progressing

Things are coming along really well.   Since my last procedure my chest is healing up really nice and looking even better.  I am still going to the gym and I am trying to take it easy but its hard.  Sometimes I do too much...and hurt myself...but I am learning my lessons for sure.  I can always tell when I hurt myself because its almost like I feel a slight tear in my chest.  Nothing does tear of course...but that is just what the pain feels like.   So I am currently avoiding doing stomach exercises and chest ones for now.   I don't know how much longer I will need to... but I will figure it out.  

Adjusting to life as a skinny person is still odd.  I feel like I have ZERO idea how to speak to the male population without coming off like I am hitting on them.  I am learning that even friendly chatting can be taken as flirting.  And sometimes I don’t have to do anything...they just notice me and immediately  give me a “look”, or say something that implies something else.  It is strange and I am adapting.  I don’t want to give people the wrong idea of course.  

But it is natural I think as well for me to like and even appreciate some of the attention.  Trying to not let it go to my head of course.  People compliment me or say how pretty I look and I just try to remind myself that although it is great to look nice, it is not the most important thing and that what really matters is showing God’s love to others.  I have been trying to read my Bible at work....and discuss church more in front of people...in the hopes to have those kinds of conversations come up.  Then I can say what a huge blessing from God this surgery has been...and give him the glory.  

I have an appointment coming up in August.  I may or may not need one more small procedure on my right breast but that should be it.  I thought I was done....but Dr. Dinick really seems to want to do a couple more fixes.  They are ones that I agree with too...so it’s all good.  I want things looking the best they can as well.  :)   I will write another update later.   Bye for now.  :)

In the Gym!

Gym done.  Glad to be able to go and exercise even if I can't do everything yet.  Working back up to it slowly and happy to see that I am healing up quickly from this latest procedure.  I have lost all the extra weight from swelling and am back down to 143 pounds.  YAY!  I have been using the app My Fitness Pal and it has really been helpful in tracking my fat intake and protein.  I can even add in my exercise.  I did forget to make my one week check up appointment though and so now I have to call and set it up but my one week check up will be turning into a two week check up.  Oh well....I am confident that all is well and that my doc will be quite pleased.

The Day After..........

Well....I didn't sleep that great.  Around 4am I woke up from the pain.  I must have been trying to move in my sleep and once I did that the pain woke me up.  From that point on I started waking up every hour until I finally just woke up and stayed up at 8:30am.  At least this time it is just my chest hurting.  Could be worse.  But I can't do a lot of things right now that require arm strength or chest muscles.  Can't even push the front door closed all the way.

 I know I am not back to square one, but maybe I'm at square 5?  lol  Either way when I go back to work on Thursday I will be pretty useless when it comes to picking up heavy objects.  So glad I got all the cleaning around here done yesterday morning.  On the plus side....my breasts look great, even with my new incision.  I am so happy with the results....they look natural and shaped just right.  I couldn't be more pleased.

No big hugs though for a bit.  I will have to be sure that I don't let anyone catch me off guard and squeeze me too tight.   Hurts to lift my arms, bend over, squeeze things, push things, I never knew until I started this whole process how much you rely on your chest muscles to do things.  It's kinda crazy really.

Scar Revision Surgery

Well my surgery went well.  It was supposed to be 2 hours long but it turned into 4 hours and 20 minutes or so because I guess during surgery Dr. Dinick decided that he wanted to make a new “pocket” for one of my implants to sit in and so that ended up taking a bit longer.  I have two totally new scars now, but that is ok.  I am starting to like my scars...kinda like they are reminders of where my body has been....and how hard I have worked to get it to this point.  I don’t mind having a lifetime memory of that to keep me in check.   

After getting home I realized even more that I do not do well when on heavy meds.  I felt so light headed and just plain out-of-whack.  At one point while checking out how things looked in the mirror I almost passed out from the bathroom being too hot.  James was there with me though and held me until the feeling passed.  I made myself not faint...which I felt was a pretty big deal.  I don’t plan on taking any of my pain meds because I feel like it is important for me to feel what hurts and what doesn’t so I don’t over do anything.  I like to be as aware of my body as I can be when it comes to this stuff...I don’t want any injuries to happen simply because I thought I could lift or push something that I should not have.  

The scar looks pretty gnarly right now...but they all did at first and it will get better.  My breasts both look so much better now.  I can tell that the implants are actually fully behind the breast muscle which is exactly where they should be.  My boobs look just right...exactly how I wanted them.  Wish I could post a picture of them but oh well.  I am wearing my surgery bra for now...a wire bra would not be very comfortable considering the new scars are right on that area where the wire would be.  

I was scheduled to work tomorrow night at Kroger but thankfully a friend switched days with me and so I don’t have to go in to work now until Thursday night.  YAY!  More time to heal that means....exactly what I wanted.  Anyway...I will write more again in a day or two.   Keeping you all updated as usual.  

Back at the Gym

The gym went great.  I worked up a small sweat and I got my heart pumping good.  Used the elliptical for 1.8 miles and I couldn’t believe how not going to the gym for three months really takes away all the effort that you put in previously.  My legs were really feeling it!  Back to square one (almost) it feels like.  After the elliptical we (my friend and I) did our arms.  I decided it was safest to use 5 pound weights today and work up to heavier stuff as time goes by.  I didn’t want to push it and re injure myself.  So we did arms, glutes, push ups, squats, lunges, and then moved on to the stomach.  

That was where I was most worried.  I knew that I could do it, but I didn’t know how much my stomach could handle.  Turns out that it couldn’t handle very much.   lol  I was able to do about 4-5 sit ups and that was it.  On the plus side I know that I will quickly be able to do more (but I am not going to rush it) and since my surgeon already tightened my stomach muscles from the inside getting them to show from the outside shouldn’t be too difficult.  So all in all....one hour at the gym well spent.  I usually go 3 days a week so my next day back will be Wednesday.  I am sure I will need the day off from it since I am betting my legs will be super sore tomorrow morning.  lol  

3 Month Check-Up

I had my three month check up today with my surgeon.  Once again I was naked and examined and poked and prodded, mostly on my breasts...and even though it has happened a bunch of times already it is still very odd to have someone look at you like you are a piece of art, or equipment, basically...like something to be examined and scrutinized.  It’s odd...and really just a strange feeling.  But I was fully looked over and in the end Dr. Dinick decided that he wants to do some outpatient surgery on me.  He basically wants to move around my scars, which in the process will adjust my breasts to a better position.  Also...he is going to open the left breast up and move my implant some.  It is not sitting as well as it should be and is not looking the same as the right breast because of it.  So...he will be adjusting that as well.  Lastly, he will be adjusting the scar on my stomach too...tightening up the skin some and what not.  I am excited.  

It is an outpatient procedure like I said, so I won’t have to take any time off from work or anything and it shouldn’t be a procedure that takes long to do either.  I will probably wear my support bra from my surgery for a few days at first, since my scar will actually be moved to where the wire on my regular bra will be and that will most likely be uncomfortable after this is done.  I didn’t know at first that there would be more to do...but I am glad to have my surgeon being so diligent and wanting to have everything be perfect.  Makes me feel like I am in good hands.  This is all taking place on June 10th, sometime in the morning.  I won’t know what time exactly yet until they call and tell me.  So anyway...I will update you all more once I know more, and of course I will update you when the procedure is done too.  :)

Tracking

Its been awhile since I last wrote and I thought I should update you all.  In five more days it will have been three months since I had my tummy tucks and breast lift/implants.  I'm still healing up well.  Quite well.  My incisions still look great.  I have not noticed much of a change in them recently but I also dont expect there to be.  I know it will take quite some time before significant change happens in how they look.   It could be a whole year!  I almost have full strength back.  I still can't lift heavy items when they are low to the ground and I have noticed that when I try to use my muscles more than usual... like really use my strength.... its odd....I know I should be able to but its like my muscles don't exist.  I try to pull windows down and I can't make my arms do it.  Its odd.  They are getting better the more my breasts heal up...so I know its just about waiting for more time to go by.  I'm just anxious I guess.

Especially since I head back to the gym on June 1st.   I know I won't be able to run... probably not jog either...and I don't know how much I can work on my stomach...but I'm going to try and just start off small and easy...not push it of course.   I just really want to stay fit.  I really want to keep this body looking as good as Dr. Dinick made it look.  I'm determined to not gain this weight back.  Which is probably why when ever I weigh myself I am always very aware of what the scale says.

For instance,  I have not been journalling my food in take for a very long time because I felt confident that I just knew what I was taking in really well.  But the scale says I weigh 146 pounds right now instead of the 143 pounds I was at about 3 weeks ago.  I can only assume that is because I'm eating more fat than I should be.   I know three pounds isn't alot....but you have to put yourself in my shoes I guess and really understand how scary the idea of going back to where I was is to me.   I'm sure I'm just being paranoid.... but even so I would rather just start tracking my food again and make sure I'm not eating more fats than I need to be.

So I did.   I have my app back on my phone again and I'm tracking everything.   Did really good today too.  If I do this for awhile and stay at the same weight than that's fine.... at least then I will know it is what I'm supposed to weigh... and I can accept that just fine.  

Anyway....nothing else going on...I will update though after my next appointment.  I should have some news at that point about my right breast and if we will be adjusting my scar on that one in an attempt too slightly move my nipple to face more forward.