Big Girl Mentality

I have noticed that one of the harder things to do when you are losing weight is to start changing the way you think of yourself and view yourself. I have the “big girl mentality” and it is a habit that I have had for so long, I hardly even know how to begin to break it. There are so many things that I just did a certain way simply because my size required it. For instance...I always made sure I parked in a spot that gave me ample room to get in and out of my vehicle with ease. Being a girl means I need way more room to maneuver. Sometimes I would park and have a lot of space to get out only to find that while I was gone someone parked next to me and gave me hardly any space to get back in. For the average sized person that amount of space would be fine...just not me. Now when I park and I think to myself that I need more room, I have to pause and really evaluate it...I have to realize that what I am thinking is in regard to the “old” me, and the new thinner me does not have to worry about that so much. I can get in and out just fine now with an average amount of space. It is just so hard to make this new way of thinking a habit...I have to keep reminding myself.

It’s the same way with buying clothes. I shop for shirts in the regular section now with all the other girls and even though I can fit into a size large now I can’t help but look at the shirt and tell myself that there is no way that it will fit...that shirt is way too small for me! lol Or sometimes it is something as simple as walking up a hill. I used to dread it...totally dread it since I knew that it would mean I would be near death (or feel like I was at least), but now I have to remind myself that even though it isn’t easy yet...it certainly is MUCH easier than it was. And of course, the more weight I lose, the easier and easier it is going to get.

My inner monologue has to be changed as well. The things I say to myself about how I look need to change. Not just because my body is improving but also because it simply isn’t healthy to constantly be saying negative things about myself. I can’t think to myself that I am disgusting looking...or fat...or unattractive, I need to change my perceptions...I need to start viewing myself the same way that I know God does. Beautiful.

Anyway...so those were some thoughts that I had today.... :)